I havent written in a while…and what is ‘mellontophobia’?

This is me writing from a Sunday night, where I cant breath so all things considered I thought ‘hey, why don’t I try writing again’

this is a bad thing as I do have ambitions for a future as someone who wants to work for a magazine or even own a magazine and I am so bad at most things. When it comes to plans and setting out things to do, it is so hard for me to concentrate on the now as I kind of get scared of the future.

‘mellontophobia’ is what could be described as a fear of the future, however there is no actual scientific term for the fear of the future.

I get scared because what I’m doing right now may or may not have an impact on my future and that scares me. If I carry on with this and become weirdly famous like Zoe Sugg, It would be awesome. However If I also carry on with this and it takes up all of my time I could fail tests and become homeless.

I’m probably being dramatic. but I want to be somewhere cool and funky in the future.